Mistake #2 - Sweating the Small Stuff

I tend to hold on way too long to stuff that doesn't really matter. What kind of stuff do you ask? Insignificant things really, things like how the laundry is folded; if the laundry gets folded; how clean the house is; whether or not insignificant things are done exactly the way I want them done. These are the things I get worked up about. The biggest one is what people think of me. What do they think of me? Do they think I am a good mother, do they think I am a good wife? What can I do to improve the quality of woman I am portraying? The funny thing I realized this year as I people watched from the comfort of my friendless shell is that people are worried about so much that they hardly notice me. Can you imagine, the gall of some people not to notice me? I know! I am flabbergasted. So my effort was in vain. What a waste!

I had to shift my focus and efforts onto something more productive. Maybe I could focus on actually being a good wife and mother rather than just trying to make myself look like a good wife and mother. And then, I heard it...the sentence that both wounded and healed my heart. This sentence would be my focus and my motivation for the remainder of my life. There can be no true love if there are only thoughts of self. Hold on, let me take the knife out of my HEART! The worrying I do about the house being clean, and the laundry being done, and how I look to outsiders is so insignificant in comparison to those inside my house who suffer from my worrying. If this sentence is true, then I had to admit that the love I claimed to feel for my husband and children was empty as long as I was worried about how I was perceived. Sweating the small stuff keeps me from truly loving those closest to me. Sweating the small stuff costs way too much. Life is so short and before I know it the kids will be grown and doing their own thing. I will have all the time in the world to clean house and fold laundry. The funny thing is when that time comes I'll be wishing for these days...these days I take for granted. So I'm learning to sit back, relax, let the house be imperfect, let the laundry take longer than a day to do, let others think what they want, and I am finding myself happier. I am also finding that I am truly loving and loved truly.
I once heard someone say Being loved and loving is more important than being perfect and I couldn't agree more.