Nehemiah

Nehemiah....oh boy.  This book is going to get our church in a whole lot of trouble.  It's a good thing, don't get me wrong pastor man, but do you realize what you're doing? You're encouraging us to dream and pray and seek God regarding the plans He has for our futures.  God is giving me a vision and I know I'm not the only one.  My fellow Revolutionaries, do you realize what could happen to Tuscon if we all pursue those things that God has put in our hearts to do? Tucson will be turned upside down and inside out!  Boy oh boy oh boy....this could be big.  Can we hold to it? Can we persevere?  Can we stand the storm that comes when we decide to follow Jesus?  I can't wait to find out.

What The Heck Is Going On Here?!

What the heck is going on here?! Something is going on inside of my heart, my mind and scarier still...the depths of who I am.  I've been a Christian my whole life and I have never felt a passion stirring in me for those who don't know Jesus.  I can't stop talking about Him.  I can't stop thinking about Him.  If I didn't know better I would say I'm a new believer.  But I know what's really going on.  I've been praying that God would change my heart and soften it for Him and His people.  It's happening.  How have I gone this long without feeling this passion? If I didn't feel such an undescribable joy, I would feel sad about it.
So let me caution you who have called yourself Christian now.  Do not let your heart be hardened.  Don't start to think the way the world thinks.  God is big.  God is powerful.  But so much more importantly, God is loving.  and the best way for us to make His name famous is to allow Him to plant that love inside of our hearts.
Our church is going through a new series.  Building a City Within a City.  It is a study on Nehemiah.  The first one was awesome.  The pastor man referenced a Saturday night where he preached to 11 of us.  I remember that night.  I remember asking God that night if we were in the right place.  I saw how many people were there and it didn't look good.  I asked God for a sign.  Boy did He give me one.  That pastor man walked out on to the stage and preached.  He remembers sounding angry, I remember him sounding passionate.  I remember being floored by the passion with which he preached...to all 11 of us.  I've been asking God for the same passion.  It's taken a while, but I think I see sparks of it in my heart.  Are you passionate about God?  And if you are not, really start asking yourself, why?

A Story Worth Telling

You know those movies where the boy meets the girl. The love stories spent recalling how they almost fell in love several times. The meet, they part, they meet they part, one loves the other, it isn't reciprocated. Until the climax of the story, they meet in some sort of crisis and realize they can't live without each other and finally fall in love and live happily ever after. You know the stories I'm talking about. That is my story with God. The only twist is, He has always loved me faithfully. He's always been with me. I have always thought, "One day, I'll write my story and the world will be changed by it." I realize how vain that is now. I have spent too much time worrying that I have stories that will never be told. I worry that God has put me on a shelf to collect dust. I am so wretched. I don't deserve to have my story told for it is not my story. I don't deserve to have my name remembered. I don't deserve to be memorialized. I am a sinful woman. I have evil and selfishness in my heart. Any good that comes from my life has come at the hand of God. You, O GOD, have been the glory of my story. No one should want to remember me, nor should I want to be remembered. I have failed you over and over again. If any story is to be told about my life it should be the story of how I failed God over and over again and how He continued to bless my life. I didn't deserve it, nor did I earn it. I earned punishment, and consequence. God has given me favor. My story is no different from yours. The details may change, but God has been pursuing you just as He has pursued me. He loves you faithfully and completely, as He loves me. No. My story is no different. My good days, if I lined them all up together, would compose a paragraph, maybe. Nothing about me will change the world. I'm broken, I'm horribly imperfect, and I'm mean-spirited. My story will not make you want to follow God. God, now He's a different story. He's someone worth talking about. Did you know that He loved humanity so much that He took on human form so He could walk among us? Did you know that even though we were terribly mean to Him during His time on earth, He still loved us? Did you know He allowed Himself to be beaten and laughed at, by US, just so the price for our stupidity would be paid? Did you know that He willingly went to the cross? I would have used my power as God to put an end to the pain. I would have killed everyone who was hurting me. I would have sent us all to hell and started over and I would have felt completely justified. My bad choices, my mistakes, they all are my own doing. I chose those things. God chose to love me even though I did those things and still doing those things. No, my story isn't worth telling, unless I tell you that God is responsible for any good thing in my life. The husband I have, God gave him to me. The family I am a part of, God gave that family to me. The children I have, God gave them to me. The love that has filled my life, God is responsible for that. The peace that lives with me, it is the peace God gives. Every good and perfect thing comes from God. Do you have that? You should. God wants to give it to you. So what I know now is that, my story isn't worth telling, but if you ask me, I will tell you about the God that loves you so much and wants to come into your story and fill it with all of the love He has for you. That story would never end.