Men and Women

I got the opportunity to revisit my past yesterday. I believe it's good to do this once in a while to grab a sense of how much growth has occurred. The portion I visited had to do with my view of men and women and their relation to each other. I was amazed to find that my ideas on this topic have changed almost completely since the days of my teen-hood.

I watched many versions of relationships and decided early on that I would never depend on a man. I would never allow a man to be EVERYTHING to me. I would marry a man, I would love a man, I would allow a man to be the father of my children, but I would remain in control. I realize now that this was my response to being hurt by men over and over again. I did not realize that at the time. I spent the first several years of my marriage trying to maintain control. It was quite comical as I look back on it now. If you know my husband you know that he is a happy go lucky kind of guy, but he is strong. He'll allow me my illusion of control. He'll allow me to think I've got everything organized, but we both know, it's a joint effort. We need each other and it's a beautiful thing. Once we got past my need for control and his need to be invincible we have found we make a pretty good team.

I read in Genesis 2 today about the creation of man and woman and realized, this is the way God set it up. We compliment each other. We challenge each other. We encourage each other to grow. We hold each other accountable when we don't. Why do we fight it so fiercely? Why do we fight to be independent of each other? It's no wonder we have such a lack of strong men willing to do the job of husbanding and fathering. We've spend the past few decades telling them we don't need them. We women have convinced men and ourselves that we can do anything they can do better. Why would we need them? No wonder they have checked out. I agree...we may be able to do some things better, but why would be want to use that knowledge to push them out of the picture? Why wouldn't we want to use our knowledge to help them to become the best men they can be? We all benefit from their strength. We all benefit from their presence. We all benefit from their contributions to society. These are just questions I have running around in my mind today as I remember how fiercely I fought to do my husbands job. I find such peace and contentment in using my gifts to help him become the man God has called him to be. I find such joy and pride as I watch him take his place in society as a strong man of God. I enjoy such relief as I watch him father our children and know, they will have an opportunity I never had. He pursuing his role as a man and I am pursuing my role as a woman. It's better than the control I thought I had...so much better.